Search “networking” on Amazon and you’ll find over 258,000 books. Bing gets you 23 million results and Google gets a whopping 544 million hits. It’s a popular topic of books and blogs and, while some apply to computer networking, most apply to the act of making beneficial connections with other human beings.

In business, one has to be a great networker. With salespeople or sales leaders, we have to hire the rolodex builder not just the rolodex. You absolutely want salespeople who connect well with various people so they can create new opportunities.

Question: Do you have to be an extrovert to have the best networking skills?

My uncle took me to Kiwanis Club meetings when I was a teenager. He wanted me to learn how to make a “good first impression.” A strong handshake, a confident introduction, look people square in the eyes and “make small talk.” I’d observe others in the room who were truly enjoying the small talk, but while I’d try, I just wasn’t good at it. Even so, I’d never fail to find adults who wanted to have a deeper conversation, resulting in great exchanges about everything from sports to what to study in college.

Following college graduation, my first job was selling checks to financial institutions and one of my early responsibilities was to do booth duty at financial industry trade shows. My job was to “work the booth” but I also had to attend the cocktail hours and hand out at least 50 business cards – A strong handshake, a confident introduction, look people square in the eyes and “make small talk.” The thing I hated so much was now my job. How did that happen?

Just as I did at the Kiwanis Club meetings, I found people who weren’t interested in small talk but instead wanted deeper conversations. Sometimes we talked business, but often we dove into other topics and the people I met were happy to have deeper conversations. They didn’t want to mingle either.

I learned many things from why hay bales were round, to the exhilaration of hiking in the Andes, to the interesting responsibilities of being the runner-up to Miss Oregon. These same people wanted to learn about me in return, and we found a genuine desire to meet again. I failed miserably at handing out business cards, but I excelled at getting first meetings that turned into business.

During my early days at Microsoft I took a management training class that included an abbreviated version of the Meyers-Briggs personality test. Not surprisingly, I tested as an introvert which shocked the instructor given I was soon to become a Sales Director. He suggested that my test results were wrong and said, “There’s no way you could have succeeded in sales as an introvert.” The assumption was that all salespeople were extroverts.

That is likely what most believe but in Susan Cain’s book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, we learn that almost 50 percent of the population is introverted. With that reality, the probability is high that there are many successful, introverted salespeople who are great networkers. What are the best networking skills of introverts?

• Listening – Introverts are naturally good listeners because they naturally dislike monopolizing the conversation. There is nothing more important to customers than salespeople who really listen.
• Accountability and conflict avoidance – Per Cain’s research, introverts are naturally introspective. In my observations, when the unexpected happens it’s more natural for introverted people to ask first, “What could I have done differently?” They prefer to problem solve before speaking out. Casting unwarranted blame causes conflict so introverts avoid that and when blame is warranted it’s done so in a respectful fashion. People buy from accountable problem solvers.
• Reserved – One of the negative stereotypes of salespeople is that we’re loud, big personalities who are insincere and money-hungry. The movie Tin Men depicts the stereotype well. I’ve been told by many customers that my reserved personality eliminates the stereotypical views and puts them at ease.

If you grew up in the United States or other western cultures, you likely learned to equate extroverted personalities with traits of success but today’s research finds many examples of successful introverts such as, Bill Gates, Warren Buffett, J.K Rowling, Rosa Parks and Richard Branson – the list goes on.

Being a great networker doesn’t hinge on whether you’re an extrovert or an introvert. It hinges on your ability to receive and deliver interesting and relevant knowledge. Listening, accountability and an inviting personality are some of the best networking skills of introverts.

©2014 Rick Wong – The Five Abilities, LLC